Dean P. Simmer

A young woman died last week. A woman around my age. She was found murdered in a hotel a few blocks from my house.

Did the news talk about it? Not at first. Too many big things happened in the world that day, things that mattered. Things that needed important space on the news websites. Things like Kim Kardashian's divorce. And the number of Kid Rock concerts scheduled in Michigan this summer. You know, the important things.

Eventually it made the news, only to disappear minutes later after Reese Witherspoon's husband got arrested. Again, the important things.

Somewhere, a family learned that the story of their lives has just changed. A light in their lives has been snuffed out. And we just walk by as if nothing has happened, no notice that someone's story is over.

It makes me sad to know that this happened, that a family's life changed forever, and we didn't even blink. We've got to be better than that.

I came across this album yesterday while meeting friends in Ypsilanti. It is said that a picture is worth 1000 words and I know a ton of thoughts come to mind when I see a picture of this guy.

But the strangest piece is the horribly fake pedestal created here. We have a fictional character selecting its fictional favorite songs for fans of the TV show to enjoy. It’s Fonz’s favorites!

It got me thinking a bit further about how we often fake what we enjoy to please people or to win their affections. Sure, we all know Fonz is fake, but how fake do we choose to be to those around us?

Perhaps we owe ourselves some honesty. I wonder what Henry Winkler would think.

We’re in the midst of crunch time at work so updates have been light. Here are two things to check out in the meantime.

1. I wrote a piece for Prodigal Magazine recently that you may have missed. It covers a powerful visit to a parish that Giles and I experienced this past summer. If you haven’t already, take a quick read.

2. Google Reader is shutting down on 1 July. Weirdest announcement I have seen in a while. That said, I am in the market for a new RSS reader/blog subscribing engine. So far bloglovin seems to do the trick. Any other recommendations? (If you want you can Follow my blog with Bloglovin).

I watched recently as several people I respect, my friends Emily, Rachel and Sarah, were criticized for some things they wrote. They wrote about how certain parts of our church culture have done a good job of forcing a negative identity on many people within the church community, an identity based around past actions and missteps.

Our society is all about identity, isn’t it? How do we define others?

Black. White. Hispanic.

Republican. Democrat.

Catholic. Protestant. Muslim. Jew. Atheist.

Rich. Poor.

These are the identities we fight over, we kill over. We have built up walls to keep us away from the people that are different than us.

My friends Emily, Rachel, and Sarah were onto something, something that got missed by nitpickers looking for them to make a mistake.

Our identity is not in those things I listed above, or all of the other ways we try to prove we are better than somebody else.

Emily said simply: “I am a human. I am Emily.”

She’s right. First and foremost, we are somebody. Don’t let somebody else dictate your identity. There are plenty of things that are true about each one of us. There are plenty that aren’t.

As kids we are told that one day we will grow up and “make a name for ourselves.” Let me remind you, you have a name. You have an identity. Claim it. Grow it. Let it flourish.

Some of us, people like me, find our identity rooted in our faith. For me, that’s a must. But that doesn’t replace what I believe to be my created humanity. I am created for something, and I’m striving after it.

I’m still human. And I’m still Dean.

And I’m going to embrace your humanity too.

Photo used under Creative Commons license and originally from D Sharon Pruitt.